Nothing is Coincidental

Has the irony sunk home yet? I'm presuming that it is so obvious that no one is linking it to anything because they figure everyone will see it? I mean, this time it's bad weather, but once we're no longer beholden to Spain, Holland and Greece for our supplies of salads and summer vegetables during the most barren months of winter, don't you think that vegetable rationing and the need to import fruit and veg from even further afield, contributing to pollution by having those of us who like a bit of lettuce during the winter getting it from Malaysia rather than Spain, could end up being what supermarkets are more likely to be like post Brexit?

NPower's massive price hike on electricity is also something you should be paying attention to, especially as we're no longer able to use only our own gas and oil now it is running low. Do you honestly think when EON or NPower or one of the other of the Big 6 energy suppliers say that their increasing price rises are down to Brexit and the higher cost of buying fuel the majority of people will be happy about it because we have control again? Some might, but frankly they can as proud as a priapic pig between now and when they freeze to death for all I care. This is what they wanted, this is what they'll probably get.

Now, I desperately want Brexit to succeed, from a personal position (but I'd love to see it fail from an anthropological standpoint) because in this case I don't mind being proved wrong. In fact, I desperately want all those Leave twats to be able to remind me of the fact every day, because, frankly, if it makes life better than it is I will happily accept it, even if that sounds a tad hypercritical. The thing is when David Davis stands up in Parliament and tells us all to 'be a bit optimistic, for heaven's sake' I want to, but a) we've just quit an excellent club that 50% of the population simply didn't understand and were never properly educated about and b) THE TORIES!!!

The thing is I think many of you will probably think that there will be shortages of things, and price rises and the need to return to more seasonal produce even if it means pissing off the worthlessly selfish consumers. I expect the government is already viewing the extra food needed to be supplied by our own farmers as a good enough reason not to subsidise any of them and now that our fishermen can strip mine our waters for anything that can be eaten, the price of food will drop until there's nothing left. Then what if people can't get stuff? Can you imagine the red pepper becoming a luxury item? Some Del-Boy taking a boat over to Holland to score consignments of Dutch salad vegetables.

I think we also expect energy bills to increase, and with the introduction of a number of 'measures' to ensure our path out of the EU is not as fraught as it could be, I expect we'll feel both 'safer' and more 'encompassed' by the time 2019 comes around. Maybe a little thinner, which obviously will be good for all those obese people.

Anyone who seriously thinks that life will be cheaper, variety will be greater and happiness will be so much easier to find than it is now, please tell me how this is going to be achieved. I don't want soundbites or optimistic bollocks, I'd like some actual evidence that what 52% of the people voted for wasn't a one way path to oblivion.